Birth Story

One way to sum up Boone's birth would be to say that our car was parked in the Emergency drop-off lane from when we arrived at the hospital until 30 minutes after his delivery. It was very, very quick.

Harper, Grandma Susu, Rick and I went for Vietnamese food Saturday night hoping that some good spicy papaya salad would get things moving. Harper was being a bit of a non-listening three-year-old during dinner so I took her outside to sit on the curb and when I squatted down I felt a little trickle of what could have been my amniotic fluid. So we paid our bill, took our left-overs and headed home. It was about 7:30 PM and I hadn't felt any real contractions.

Rick put Harper to bed while I relaxed. Around 8:30 I started having contractions just a hair more intense that Braxton Hicks. I was settling in for what I thought would be a long night. Then around 11ish I had a slightly more intense contraction and had some bleeding. So, just to be safe Rick packed the car, I lay down in the backseat on my side and we headed to the hospital. It was around 11:30. Well, in the backseat things started to gear-up. I was laying on my right side, with my right-leg on the seat and my left-foot resting on the driver's side head-rest. And my contractions started getting stronger. I could still breath through them, and even laughed a little when a contraction and a right-hand turn coincided. Then we got to the ER.

Rick parked in the emergency drop-off. I waddled inside. Oh, my contractions were about 3 minutes apart and lasting about 90 seconds. And I was pretty much just moaning, really loudly through them all. Really loudly.

If at this point in the story you want to cut to the chase just imagine the stereotypical sit-com birth.

It took forever for the stupid check-in process. So much for preregistration. And the check-in, paper-work lady didn't seem to be in any hurry, but got terribly upset when I just up and left to use the restroom. I guess she wanted me to pee on the floor while she copied my insurance information.

Then an equally annoying ER nurse came with a wheelchair to take me up to labor and delivery. Well, at this point I could not sit. Just not physically possible. So after a bit of arguing and eye-rolling they let me walk. And every few minutes while walking through the ER halls I would have to start moaning and yelling and hold onto Rick. Many ER nurse's eyes were rolling I think.

Well, we made it to Labor and Delivery where they put me in the triage room. I think it must have been around 1 AM. I answered more ridiculous questions and now my contractions really got going. I could barely breath. They checked me and said I was on 2cm. Then the nurse left the room for 20 minutes. And for 20 minutes I pretty much just screamed and cried, and yelled "Why won't anyone help me?" In hindsight I was probably scaring the crap out of any other laboring women in the unit. I was REALLY yelling. So, after 20 minutes I yell at Rick, "I need to push! I need to push! Why isn't anyone helping me." Rick goes out to find a nurse. She comes back in and in 20 minutes I have gone from 2 cm to 5 cm.

The doctor on the unit is attending another birth. Thank goodness that woman delivered at 1:30 AM. Dr. Adawadkar arrived at 1:40 and I was at 8cm, and then they finally realized how quick this was happening and wanted to get me out of the triage room and into a delivery room. Of course they offered the stupid wheelchair again, and after demonstrating that there was no way in hell I could sit I walked to my room.

It's probably about 1:55 AM now, and I am screaming for an epidural. Well, they need to get a blood sample to the lab before they can get an epidural, and since they didn't realize how fast this was all happening no one had bothered getting a hep-lock in me. I have no visual memory of them trying to start an IV, but apparently it was comical, and resulted in a pool of blood after much inept fussing with needles, but I guess they got a sample. Then I screamed that I wanted a narcotic. Well, since the IV wasn't really working they had to give me a shot of Nubain intramuscularly. It must have been about 2:15 now.

I two point I tried biting down on anything to help with the pain. Well, the anythings I bit on were my husband's hand and arm. He still isn't too pleased about that.

Dr. Adawadkar checked me again, and I was fully dilated. So, no epidural; I was pretty pissed about that, and I was really pissed that the Nubain was going to take 15 minutes to take effect. I think I kept complaining about why the narcotic wasn't working, and they kept saying "5 more minutes." Well, Boone was born at 2:38 and I am pretty sure that the Nubain never took effect.

So, the pushing was actually the most pleasant part, and went very quickly. Boone is happy and healthy. So am I.