So, some of you may have read the two articles on the latest subject of pop-culture criticism: marriage.
Essay #1: "Let's Call the Whole Thing Off," by writer Sandra Tsing-Loh in The Atlantic
Essay #2: "A Vindication of Love", by essayist Christina Nehring
Essay number one does a fair amount of whining about the realities of a marriage that I am glad I wasn't a part of, and seems to come to a conclusion that some generalized requirements of modern married life are incompatible with marital bliss.
Essay number two compares literary romance across the ages with the reality of modern married life.
Both essays have gotten a lot of press in the various news/opinion sources I read, and I haven't linked to the articles because I am annoyed by them.
Essay number two annoys me because it seems to belong to the same argument that violent television/video games cause real life teen violence. As if modern men and women cannot separate dreams and fantasies from reality. I loathe the usage of this argument against anything; especially relating to adult behavior.
Essay number one: well, it reminds me of my beef with the book 'Eat, Pray, Love' or 'Wallow, Brainwash, Gluttony' (this may be unfair as I never even finished the 'Eat' part). Marriages work. Marriages fail. People can be assholes. People can be selfless, caring, supportive. Marriages can be working and failing and bliss and annoying all within the same 5 minutes (all this applies to parenthood too as far as I can tell in 9 months).
I guess I am just grumpy as these essays seem lazy, and whiny to me. And they seem to want to convince me that marriage can't work. While I can't see the future, and I have seen several of my friends' marriages end in divorce I am still a believer that even a failed marriage was worth the time and energy if only for a good story. And these two essays just aren't good enough stories.
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2 comments:
You rule. Love this post. Only read that first essay, and found it kind of insulting. Wow - so your marriage didn't work, and this means you can widely conclude that marriage itself is unworkable, and a worthless endeavor at that? Killer sample study there.
Also, as we already know, I hated Eat, Pray, Love with a passion.
Exactly! And it reminds me of a English graduate student working through their therapy with classmates. You just want to yell, "Go see a psychologist!"
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